dreams are funny. i tend to have reoccurring themes in my dreams. Over the last year i have had easily 6-8 dreams about pregnancy. It's either me or one specific friend (who will remain nameless - but note - she isn't pregnant :)). It usually about one of us sharing the news that we were pregnant-not labor, delivery or anything else.
This last dream, the night of the 18th (night before Mike's 33rd b-day), I dreamt that i was rapidly approaching the 2nd trimester and was starting to show. I knew I had to start telling people and I was scared. In my dream, I felt the baby kick (which was probably gas from dinner that night). Anyway, I was in the hallway next to my office and I told both Josh and Lee that I was pregnant. Josh was excited-as animated Josh usually reacts to exciting news. Lee was not so ecstatic - in fact, his first words were "was this unplanned?" in a monotone voice. I replied with a "yes" and he stayed pretty stoic. Then he responded with "That's cool" and went on his way down the stairs. That was the end of the dream. I didn't wake up with any emotion but shock that i just had ANOTHER freaking dream about pregnancy.
i tend to get freaked out by these pregnancy dreams as I am warming up to the idea of a child, but not totally sold on having a kid until we are a bit more stable (do we ever get stable though, I ask?).
Jung really thought that dream interpretation opened up the windows of our souls. I dont know if i really agree, but I am curious to see what "they" think. I wikipedia-ed dream interpretation and found some interesting things. (Don't worry, I don't put a ton of merit in dream interpretation, i just thought this could be pretty funny to hear about, that is all!)
The Curious Dreamer says that pregnancy dreams are one of these things:
- a process or project somewhere in your life (they seem so show up during stressful periods at work where I have to really produce)
- responsibility for another person somehow in your life (wow, it is kinda true-i feel a lot of responsibility for others in my life)
- responsibility for self or for your inner child (i have been growing more as an adult lately)
- a curiosity about pregnancy (I am sure there is some of that in this dream)
The Dream Dictionary says that a pregnancy dream symbolizes new life, creative, inventive, that i should be prepared to produce something. (i think this is somewhat accurate in my life)
SoulFuture.com says that dreaming of being i may indicate:
- incubating a new project, relationship or cycle within (see above)
- manifesting my desires (maybe a little bit)
- a guidance dream heralding an actual pregnancy (haha, not actually possible)
- a desire to be pregnant (could be)
Ok, I think it is a multitude of things, so this is my interpretation:
1. I am afraid of some unexpected thing to happen-I like controlling my life as it is. The unexpected scares me (when it comes to a child being dependent on me for 18-24 years).
2. I think the responsibility for self and others is true-I feel loads of responsibility at work that is hard for me to process at time or categorize. I am really learning about myself in this time frame and find that I am learning to take responsibility for my actions-as much as I can. But I am learning boundaries as well.
3. I am sure this is about my desire to one day be pregnant. It will be a joyous occasion. I know I am processing it and learning on how to be a woman, how to be me, and not just falling to the stereotypes of motherhood. I am really wading through the years of crap in the background that has held me back from motherhood. BUT, I am still processing and thinking. One day it will happen, but just not this week. :)
Anyway, this week is exciting-it's Easter this sunday, which means 1) we celebrate hard core the gift of Jesus' resurrection and 2) i have a sunday night off. silly I know, but I am looking forward to being in my bathrobe at 5 pm, making frozen pizza and relaxing. I haven't done that in 6 months, so I can't wait. I like Easter-the new life of spring really accentuates the new life we have in Jesus. We just spent 5 hours setting up the installation in the sanctuary tonight and it is BEAUTIFUL (thanks team!). It was amazing.
Back to spring and Jesus. slowly but surely, maybe I will shed my SAD (seasonal affective disorder). i love summertime-flip flops, shorts, and a tan. I can't wait!!
Now, after I have spent almost 2 hours relaxing after a long day, I am going to bed. Night night my blog friends, nighty night!
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